It’s not if, or. I spent most of my life living in apartments and they can be a lot of work - when you didn’t have hot water or heat, or washers and washing machines, when you don’t have room for things and need to constantly clean and rearrange to fit your life in small space. And btw, love all the grey in my house, but still hear from people that we did not plan for future buyers who may not like our bold Spanish tile or prefer beige (I hate beige as you hate grey:-).
Enjoy your spacious home. Hopefully it will hold your growing family in the future and you can always find ways to share it, if you ever chose to. I know a family who is always hosting students and young people for free in the upstairs room of the old brownstone. A miracle opportunity for those who need it in the heart of a cold, expensive metropolis.
Oh, his urban loft is a cool old former warehouse/factory space in the old garment district of his city. It's awesome, but VERY different from my house.
My house is full of weird stuff. I also have an old marble sink from a newspaper restroom, and a stained glass window that was supposedly saved from the old Carnegie Library when it was replaced. Now, if I could just do something about the state of the hallway where we ripped off wallpaper but haven't finished patching the plaster ... it's the first thing you see when you walk in and it's terrible :(
I had a house once that I completely remodeled (I didn't replace the toilet or tub though) and I well remember all of the hours, money for materials and hard work it was to finish it all. Then I sold the house and moved across the country.
I'm too old to go through all of that again, but I don't regret doing it all. Sometimes it all comes down to a labour of love. That is what a house comes down to sometimes. I still putter around my current house, doing a little painting or some other work now and again. We did a lot of remodeling of the kitchen when we bought this house, some I did myself. I completely rewired the house for extensive internet capabilities back then. There have been some other little projects that I found, that were better off being accomplished on my own as hired helpers were pretty useless. At least American born ones anyway. But that is another story for another day.
Enjoy your house for as long as you can. Don't take anything for granted these days.
It's amazing what sticks with you about a particular house. For me, our new home in Chicago was bare-bones and needed our "custom" touch. We created an awesome library room/study, one that I'd kill to have in our Southern California home (which we also redid completely, though it lacks the space for that elegant Chicago library).
We also live in a “it’s us” home, Michelle. Some (a lot) (okay most) of the wallpaper and window treatments are from the previous owners 25 years ago, and very possibly date to the original 1990 construction. We dread how some realtor will tell us to strip everything, paint and re-do, so we’re looking hard at leaving sales money on the table and offering the place as-is when it’s time to move into the retirement community (which could be this year). Plus they get the yard stuff and ladders and snow shovels in the garage. And shelves (LOTS of shelves) in the basement. And the empty boxes in the attic storage because there’s no way I am crawling back there to pull those out…
But we will miss our home very much. On mornings when the snow is new and we look at the sun brightening up our backyard while we eat breakfast, we miss it already.
Enjoy every moment of it for as long as you are able to stay there. I can see these days coming for us eventually. I really, really try to enjoy it all.
The second half of life goes a helluva lot faster.
Our Los Angeles home was built in 1978. Go figure! It was all we could afford when I transferred here from Chicago in 1990, and it took until late 1991 before we could get the financing in order. Needless to say, many years of reno ensued -- some of which are now on their third go-round. Again, go figure! Sorry to year you're leaving your treasure. I feel for you. As for us, we'll stay put until they plant us in the ground. There's no place like home.
I love Michelle's posts! I'm recommending her on my Substack. Besides, I've redone a house in Southern California for over 30 years. I can certainly relate to this post (a very funny reminder of our past do-it-yourself projects). It's quite different from the new house in St. Charles, Illinois, which we also "customized" to meet our needs. It's too bad we only got to live there two years before I was transferred to "sticker shock" Los Angeles.
Your friend the renter is my role model now. I’ll be leaving a 350-year-old pirate house (literally) soon, and while I have loved it, in my 60s I just don’t want to care for it by myself.
It makes a big difference when you weigh joint ownership against solo responsibilities. After my surprise divorce, I look forward to letting the landlord deal with the problems 😀
I was trying to fix up a fixer upper but everything I had outside was destroyed in hate crime. Gardens,tools,shingles, yard furniture,nails, screws, nuts and bolts, brand new paints and brushes and more...even my laundry hanging out to dry. Both Native American Religious Artwork and a n Inherited Expensive Ceramic Art Nativity Scene.
Then burglars broke in repeatedly and stole all tools and everything I bought to fix up the house and so much more. I loved trying to fix things up but having everything I needed purchased only to have it destroyed has killed me. I had planned to stay in this house till I died but the idea of buying everything all over again in the most race hatred ethnic hatred religious hatred AKA white supremacist city government in the world seems impossible. Who would have guessed Davenport Iowa was the most white supremacist city government in the world in the 2020s. Remember the 324 main st apartment building collapse.....3 human deaths an amputation....after inspectors said out loud white landlords are "higher class" and black tenants native Americans mixed race etc are "lowlifes".....
But I appreciated your article. The joy of fixing things up and landscaping and gardening seems like what made me human....back when I used to be human.....
And I like your "Destigmatizing Poverty" idea. It's shameful to be poor even if you work 60 hours a week or more at or below Minimum Wage. Poverty smells like failure and desperation.
And building your pond deep enough so that the giant goldfish don't freeze to death in the winter was a good idea.
My wife and I were never as ambitious as you, but through many years and moves, we’ve done simple wiring, changed a few hot water heaters and refinished some floors. Our current house is our retirement house. We’ve always liked color, but we went all out with this one. The outside is mostly white with five different colors of trim. Inside we have rooms that are variously blue, green, red, orange, or yellow. The dining room has a dark pink below the white chair rail and light green above it. The ceiling is yellow. A real estate agent would be appalled, but we love it. Enjoy your colorful home.
If you really want to see some, follow me back on Bluesky, and I’ll send a few. Substack won’t let me paste a picture in a comment. And if you don’t want to follow back on Bluesky, I understand. Holding on to any kind of privacy in this age requires saying no a lot.
Oh this was so beautiful to read Michelle! Thank you. I have been doing a lot of deep thoughts about this very subject…just turned 65 and looking at our 1.5 acres and as I walk by the weeds think “I really should get out there-it’s not that cold today.” We bought this place 5 years ago specifically so we could grow a lot of our own food—and we enjoy that but it takes a lot of time.
Growing your own food is very time-consuming but therapeutic. I only have enough sunny space for a couple of tomatoes, some herbs, rhubarb and (oddly) a currant bush. I have a couple of citrus trees that come inside in winter. I’ve always dreamed of having a larger garden.
If you get a chance to mention it to him, the greatest challenge right now is in trying to imagine the plan that a reasonable person might come up with, if a reasonable person ever decided to hoist an Otari MTR-90 multitrack tape machine up a steep 'Jersey winder' staircase such as the ones that, you know, go up to the attics in 215-year-old houses.
I love my house but it’s 2800 ft.² and 100 years old. Lots of steps, always something to fix. I’m a widow now and I only use half the rooms. I’m thinking I should move into something smaller but I still love this place, but it is definitely a lot of work cleaning and maintaining and I worry the steps will be too much
I like your odd taste. You and Harrie have made your own little private resort. I'm all about privacy on my property; all your creations appeal to me immensely. Why ever go anywhere else?? I've watched your renovation journey for a while now, and I'm thrilled with what ya'll have done with the place! And all on a budget, yay!
P.S. I am jealous of you for your handsome talented husband who can do anything☺️
Enjoy your not-gray house! You bought it for you, not some mythical future resident who can repaint it themselves anyway.
Thank you!
You should see the reactions when people walk in. Always surprised. Not sure it’s always a pleasant surprise! But a surprise nonetheless.
It’s not if, or. I spent most of my life living in apartments and they can be a lot of work - when you didn’t have hot water or heat, or washers and washing machines, when you don’t have room for things and need to constantly clean and rearrange to fit your life in small space. And btw, love all the grey in my house, but still hear from people that we did not plan for future buyers who may not like our bold Spanish tile or prefer beige (I hate beige as you hate grey:-).
Enjoy your spacious home. Hopefully it will hold your growing family in the future and you can always find ways to share it, if you ever chose to. I know a family who is always hosting students and young people for free in the upstairs room of the old brownstone. A miracle opportunity for those who need it in the heart of a cold, expensive metropolis.
I love that your backsplash was your newsroom’s ceiling! Enjoy the home you’ve put your heart into. It has a lot more soul than an urban apartment.
Oh, his urban loft is a cool old former warehouse/factory space in the old garment district of his city. It's awesome, but VERY different from my house.
My house is full of weird stuff. I also have an old marble sink from a newspaper restroom, and a stained glass window that was supposedly saved from the old Carnegie Library when it was replaced. Now, if I could just do something about the state of the hallway where we ripped off wallpaper but haven't finished patching the plaster ... it's the first thing you see when you walk in and it's terrible :(
I had a house once that I completely remodeled (I didn't replace the toilet or tub though) and I well remember all of the hours, money for materials and hard work it was to finish it all. Then I sold the house and moved across the country.
I'm too old to go through all of that again, but I don't regret doing it all. Sometimes it all comes down to a labour of love. That is what a house comes down to sometimes. I still putter around my current house, doing a little painting or some other work now and again. We did a lot of remodeling of the kitchen when we bought this house, some I did myself. I completely rewired the house for extensive internet capabilities back then. There have been some other little projects that I found, that were better off being accomplished on my own as hired helpers were pretty useless. At least American born ones anyway. But that is another story for another day.
Enjoy your house for as long as you can. Don't take anything for granted these days.
It's amazing what sticks with you about a particular house. For me, our new home in Chicago was bare-bones and needed our "custom" touch. We created an awesome library room/study, one that I'd kill to have in our Southern California home (which we also redid completely, though it lacks the space for that elegant Chicago library).
Your last line especially resonates! Everybody needs to remember that.
We also live in a “it’s us” home, Michelle. Some (a lot) (okay most) of the wallpaper and window treatments are from the previous owners 25 years ago, and very possibly date to the original 1990 construction. We dread how some realtor will tell us to strip everything, paint and re-do, so we’re looking hard at leaving sales money on the table and offering the place as-is when it’s time to move into the retirement community (which could be this year). Plus they get the yard stuff and ladders and snow shovels in the garage. And shelves (LOTS of shelves) in the basement. And the empty boxes in the attic storage because there’s no way I am crawling back there to pull those out…
But we will miss our home very much. On mornings when the snow is new and we look at the sun brightening up our backyard while we eat breakfast, we miss it already.
Enjoy every moment of it for as long as you are able to stay there. I can see these days coming for us eventually. I really, really try to enjoy it all.
The second half of life goes a helluva lot faster.
Our Los Angeles home was built in 1978. Go figure! It was all we could afford when I transferred here from Chicago in 1990, and it took until late 1991 before we could get the financing in order. Needless to say, many years of reno ensued -- some of which are now on their third go-round. Again, go figure! Sorry to year you're leaving your treasure. I feel for you. As for us, we'll stay put until they plant us in the ground. There's no place like home.
I agree with you - our 1921 house with all its idiosyncracies (e.g. multiple hooks from high ceilings, 1980s wallpaper!) - will be sold ‘as is’.
I love Michelle's posts! I'm recommending her on my Substack. Besides, I've redone a house in Southern California for over 30 years. I can certainly relate to this post (a very funny reminder of our past do-it-yourself projects). It's quite different from the new house in St. Charles, Illinois, which we also "customized" to meet our needs. It's too bad we only got to live there two years before I was transferred to "sticker shock" Los Angeles.
Thank you, Suzanne!
I admire you. I'm very low maintenance. I don't even want a plant.
Wait, you don't have any plants????
Your friend the renter is my role model now. I’ll be leaving a 350-year-old pirate house (literally) soon, and while I have loved it, in my 60s I just don’t want to care for it by myself.
It makes a big difference when you weigh joint ownership against solo responsibilities. After my surprise divorce, I look forward to letting the landlord deal with the problems 😀
Ugh, a surprise divorce ... I am so sorry. Had one of those and I know how hard that is.
I was trying to fix up a fixer upper but everything I had outside was destroyed in hate crime. Gardens,tools,shingles, yard furniture,nails, screws, nuts and bolts, brand new paints and brushes and more...even my laundry hanging out to dry. Both Native American Religious Artwork and a n Inherited Expensive Ceramic Art Nativity Scene.
Then burglars broke in repeatedly and stole all tools and everything I bought to fix up the house and so much more. I loved trying to fix things up but having everything I needed purchased only to have it destroyed has killed me. I had planned to stay in this house till I died but the idea of buying everything all over again in the most race hatred ethnic hatred religious hatred AKA white supremacist city government in the world seems impossible. Who would have guessed Davenport Iowa was the most white supremacist city government in the world in the 2020s. Remember the 324 main st apartment building collapse.....3 human deaths an amputation....after inspectors said out loud white landlords are "higher class" and black tenants native Americans mixed race etc are "lowlifes".....
But I appreciated your article. The joy of fixing things up and landscaping and gardening seems like what made me human....back when I used to be human.....
And I like your "Destigmatizing Poverty" idea. It's shameful to be poor even if you work 60 hours a week or more at or below Minimum Wage. Poverty smells like failure and desperation.
And building your pond deep enough so that the giant goldfish don't freeze to death in the winter was a good idea.
☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆ Dodobbird.pixels.com (free to view art)
https://www.gofundme.com/f/my-puppy-wants-a-cheeseburger
That’s dreadful. I’m so sorry that happened to you.
My wife and I were never as ambitious as you, but through many years and moves, we’ve done simple wiring, changed a few hot water heaters and refinished some floors. Our current house is our retirement house. We’ve always liked color, but we went all out with this one. The outside is mostly white with five different colors of trim. Inside we have rooms that are variously blue, green, red, orange, or yellow. The dining room has a dark pink below the white chair rail and light green above it. The ceiling is yellow. A real estate agent would be appalled, but we love it. Enjoy your colorful home.
I’d love to see some pictures!
Down with gray, beige and greige unless that’s truly what you love.
If you really want to see some, follow me back on Bluesky, and I’ll send a few. Substack won’t let me paste a picture in a comment. And if you don’t want to follow back on Bluesky, I understand. Holding on to any kind of privacy in this age requires saying no a lot.
Oh this was so beautiful to read Michelle! Thank you. I have been doing a lot of deep thoughts about this very subject…just turned 65 and looking at our 1.5 acres and as I walk by the weeds think “I really should get out there-it’s not that cold today.” We bought this place 5 years ago specifically so we could grow a lot of our own food—and we enjoy that but it takes a lot of time.
Growing your own food is very time-consuming but therapeutic. I only have enough sunny space for a couple of tomatoes, some herbs, rhubarb and (oddly) a currant bush. I have a couple of citrus trees that come inside in winter. I’ve always dreamed of having a larger garden.
"When I say “we,” I generally mean Harrie." Still laughing.
As a former journalist who’s currently building a recording studio in the attic of a house built in 1810, I found this piece unusually relatable.
Oh, you really should consult with my husband! (He studied audio engineering in Amsterdam).
If you get a chance to mention it to him, the greatest challenge right now is in trying to imagine the plan that a reasonable person might come up with, if a reasonable person ever decided to hoist an Otari MTR-90 multitrack tape machine up a steep 'Jersey winder' staircase such as the ones that, you know, go up to the attics in 215-year-old houses.
I love my house but it’s 2800 ft.² and 100 years old. Lots of steps, always something to fix. I’m a widow now and I only use half the rooms. I’m thinking I should move into something smaller but I still love this place, but it is definitely a lot of work cleaning and maintaining and I worry the steps will be too much
This situation is a tough call.
I LOVE your backsplash!
I like your odd taste. You and Harrie have made your own little private resort. I'm all about privacy on my property; all your creations appeal to me immensely. Why ever go anywhere else?? I've watched your renovation journey for a while now, and I'm thrilled with what ya'll have done with the place! And all on a budget, yay!
P.S. I am jealous of you for your handsome talented husband who can do anything☺️
He’s really good at all this stuff, and just designs as he goes along. I need to share more of what he did with the attic.